Hello all.... havent posted here before.... though now finding it necessary....

Before my mans most recent jail sentance he was heavily into rocks.... he was stealing, lying, hiding.... & pretty much all the other behaviors related to the usage...

He went to jail on dui/dv charges... served 111 days.... was released & went right back to using....

I do not know what to do.... he is attempting to hid it from his friends & others... i figured it out pretty quick...

He told me he has been using that he is scared of the upcoming felony firearm charges in another county....
He also told me he has been taking money from his friend/roommate to buy the drugs.... he even pawned a ring his mother left him... (she died while he was in prison in the 90's).... he told me not to tell any one.... but i feel it should be done....

i dont think that any one should be used in this way....

How can i help my man????

Wow- I hate to hear this.
Does he want help? Is he trying to quit?
Cuz that would be the first step.
If he is ready to quit, maybe he should check into some programs.
I think that you might want to hit an Al-anon meeting yourself, just so you know how to take care of yourself, etc.
I will try and answer any questions you may have- but of course I am not an expert. SO, if you just want to talk or whatever, pm me.
Good luck!

Well, when it comes down to it, he is the one who should do the telling. Does he have any intentions of quitting or coming clean with his family and friends? That is one of the ways he can begin the process. Sometimes when we try to help people by letting everyone else know what is going on, the tides turn and we end up looking like the bad guy. Maybe if you talk to him and let him know if he is not ready to do something about it, you feel obligated because you hate to see people being used. Thing of it is, probably most of his other friends have figured it out also. Good luck.

He says he wants to quit .... has gone to a few meetings since he has been out.....

Court ordered 'moral reconantion therapy,' was looking into treatment before he went in.....

The hopes now that he's got a job it will change..... who knows...

Anyways.... The friend in question has figured it out, from what i can gather... he is not one to disclose information to 3rd parties....

My man mentioned it to me this past weekend that he was going to talk to his friend....

Well his friend told me that he is going to talk to him when he gets home from work..... Dont want to be there for that one.....

I am looking into groups.... Its a hard one.... need one with some kind of childcare, though i do not hide much from my daughter....

I may go with him to his meeting tonight... havent quite decided...
Was kind of hoping to coordinate his meetings with mine so we are in the same building at the same time... dealing with the same issues from different perspectives...

Thanks all.....

If he is willing, check into programs for himself it would be a good start. In the meantime, like someone suggested, look into nar-anon or ala-non for yourself.