I don't know what in the world is wrong with me!! tomorrow is almost here and for the strangest reason i just don't want to go visit. I'm so sick of the whole thing i could just scream...I wish visit was still on sunday instead of saturdays. Its like I've worked my but off all week, luckly not much time a the ball park but my little girls been sick and this morning my teenage boy got up sick. The whole house is a mess (and i just can't stand it) the yard looks like a junk yard..and i've got to go to prison tomorrow...i know it sounds childish...whats up with me? do you guys ever just feel like "not going to do it?"

Kenny looks so forward to visits and i understand but i'm just not up to it this weekend, but i'll feel so quilty about it later...aww i'm going nuts here....PMS maybe?

:eek: :rolleyes: :idea: :confused: :sleepy: :yuck: :banghead: :banghead: :banghead: :slap: :argh:

Girl I used to feel like that when my visits were on Sundays. I hated it cuz I never felt like if I had a weekend. I work Monday through Friday and my Saturdays I usually get up and do things anyway and I used to like to sleep in on Sundays but when I used to have to visit on Sundays I just never got to relax so I was glad when i started to go on Saturdays but even then sometimes I hated it. It's hard it feels more like a chore sometimes than a privilege we get. I even felt guilty cuz when my car broke and I couldnt get a ride it was like a relief to have the day to myself but then i would start to feel guilty for feeling that way. Luckily he is home now and we relax all day on sundays usually.

i'm with boxersgirl...my visit last week was on saturday and I felt great...this weekend it is on Sunday :(

Sometimes I feel the same way-do you visist every weekend>? If so take a day for YOU!!! He will understand. Alot of times I dont want to go actually I dread it-=--I even get mad when the alarm clock goes off the morning of--but after I drive the 225 miles one way and he walks in I feel better then at the end of the visit I dread the ride home.

Its hard!! Explain to him you need some time and I think he will tell you to stay home and enjoy ((maybe not in those words, LOL))

Be safe
ONE

I feel that way sometimes too. I work two jobs and in my free time, I go to see him. I just went last weekend and because of something that happened, I chose to go tomorrow too. I need to see him and know that everything is ok. But I'm already not looking forward to doing the drive. I wake up at 5 to go see him, then I have to wake up at 4 for my second job on Sunday. Then I had told him I would go up on Mothers Day which is the following weekend. And I'm bringing his mom so it's going to be another long day!!!!!! I think we all feel the same way from time to time....but I know I get over it while I'm there...he makes it worth it to me....I love that man.

Sometimes when I am tired, I don't feel like it.. Not really being there, but I don't feel like dealing with the hassle beforehand.. But when I am there, it was all worth it!

I can feel you on that..sometimes i can't wait for sunday to get here and to see my man and there are sometimes when i hate getting up at 4:30 in the morning and dread the drive there but when i get there it is all ok...

I'm glad to hear that it's not just me.:) I'm so burned out on visiting and writing letters that I don't anymore. We just talk on the phone - I work two jobs and go to school full time and even though he's only 2 1/2 hours away, a lot goes into going up for a visit - they (our guys) have no idea, they just want us there. I had foot surgery two weeks ago, so I'm laid up for a while, and I'm really enjoying my time off and it will be at least another 5-6 weeks before I'm up and around like I used to be. So at least during this time my husband no expectations about anything. During this time I don't have to worry about going to visit or anything - what a relief.

Denise, you shouldn't feel guilty for needing some time to yourself. Hopefully your husband will understand. As much as we try, none of us have red capes on our backs - we're not superwomen and we can't do it all - all the time. Take some time for you.

I guess I am the oddball here. I work Sunday thru Thursday, get up at 5 Friday morning to get ready for 2 hour drive to visit for one hour. Saturday's I have to myself but I would be there any and every day if they would let me! Call me crazy!

I used to feel that way when I went to visit every week. I got so tired of spending my day driving and in line at the prison. I finally broke down and told him and he understood. I just explained that it wasnt about him..just about the whole process. And he was cool with it or at least acted like he was. I just felt like a whole day was gone to the dang line at the prison!

I am an oddball as well mrs. phil. They wont let me visit so I would just about kill for a visit. I only live 1 hour away so I would go everyday they let me.

My wife got to the point that ya she wanted to visit but needed her time more that day and stayed home. Made me mad at times but I got over it. After reading so many posts sinse I found this site I have a batter feel for what all you ladies go through. If you need your time he will just have to deal with it. Take the time to do for you.

I have felt the same way too Denise. I explained it to my husband and he understood. At that time we we visiting every other weekend, alternating Saturdays and Sundays. Now we visit every other Sunday with a two hour drive, another hour in line and 3 hours to visit. It gets hard doing that and dealing with the family that's in the free world too. Take some time for yourself and things will get better for you!
Take care,

You sound like you need a break!
I can't say i ever look forward to visits anymore. I'm just sick of the whole thing. But if i REALLY don't want to go, but go anyway out of guilt or sense of obligation, I end up regretting it, cuz it shows. It's better for them to have no visit than a bad visit.

thanks everyone!!! i should have followed my gut feeling and stayed my but at home. It was an awful visit. he was ill as a hornet, i was late so that made things even worse. Next time I just don't feel "Up to IT" i will stay at home.....i'll be so glad when this mess it OVER!!!!

dj

I am a long ways away, so I don't visit that often. But I can imagine it would get to be wayyyy too much for you with children, with two jobs, trying to visit every week, etc. Even without any time driving to a prison or visiting, most single moms are scrambling all weekend trying to do chores, spend time with the kids. Being the support person for an inmate is a LOT of WORK.

DARN IT..I DON'T HAVE A CLUE WHATS WRONG WITH ME!! its been 2 weeks (almost) since the last lousy visit and i'm due another one in just two days...i still don't want to go!!!

I'm just so burned out on it, i've got to get out of this mode soon......help

Denise,
Maybe you just need some time to yourself, and the fact your last visit didn't go well.
Take some time to yourself, you deserve it. Look at all the time you devote to Kenny, maybe now it your turn...pamper yourself....enjoy your week end.
Linda

If you really don't want to go, maybe you should stay home this week. I'm sure Kenny will understand.

I agree do something for you!! I havent been in several weeks, not in the mood to go so it will probably be at least June before I go again. I get tired of devoting my day off, spending all day and any extra money I have to visit him in prison. He wants to see us more? He should have been where he belonged the night he got arrested,

Take care of you!! Maybe you can plan something fun and relaxing for yourself this weekend and go again later???

ONE

well ladies, i'm not going. I got a real pissie letter from him yesterday and i'm just not in the mood to deal with the whole prison thing this weekend. Its so strange to feel this way. I love that man behond words and i know that he knows that. I'm am just so ready to live a normal (what ever that is) life.

I just sometimes we just need a prison break...LOL...and i'm taking one...

Good for you!!!! Enjoy your prison free weekend!

ONE

Denise,
You go girl....take the week end for yourself....Pamper yourself & enjoy. Maybe it will help him not be so pissie.....enjoy your time for a change.
God Bless,
Linda

I would love to be able to go every weekend! I have an 8 hour drive 1 way to get to my guy, so its usually a 2 day trip. I love every minute of it. Appreciate that you can go weekly, and take a weekend off once in awhile for YOU.

You're okay!! When my husband was in, he was in a pre-release facility about 2 1/2 hours away from us for about 7 months. The kids and I went to see him there ONE TIME, and that was on Christmas. I was so burned out of the whole prison deal, including visitation, that I just couldn't go. Granted, my kids have very heavy sports schedules, but I just didn't go. He'll live. I always say, I have to take care of me, or there is no "we".

You go Denise,it's time that you took a little YOU time.And I truely believe he will live through it!!!!

I don't know what in the world is wrong with me!! tomorrow is almost here and for the strangest reason i just don't want to go visit. I'm so sick of the whole thing i could just scream...I wish visit was still on sunday instead of saturdays. Its like I've worked my but off all week, luckly not much time a the ball park but my little girls been sick and this morning my teenage boy got up sick. The whole house is a mess (and i just can't stand it) the yard looks like a junk yard..and i've got to go to prison tomorrow...i know it sounds childish...whats up with me? do you guys ever just feel like "not going to do it?"

Kenny looks so forward to visits and i understand but i'm just not up to it this weekend, but i'll feel so quilty about it later...aww i'm going nuts here....PMS maybe?

:eek: :rolleyes: :idea: :confused: :sleepy: :yuck: :banghead: :banghead: :banghead: :slap: :argh:

Denise I wish I could visit my boyfriend at bibb co. c.f. but Im alll the way up here in vermont going at christmas though could you give me some info on visitation and general

Denise?

Did you go this weekend? I did not, short on money and I am just not feeling it! Maybe I am ready for this to end--you think? I am writing him a letter now and I figure i will increase the letters and spread out the visits.

Hope you are having a good weekend!

ONE

yes i went, the break done both of us some good, I was just so sick of the whole "prison visit" thing, but saturday we had a great visit, I think sometimes we all just need to take a break...

DeniseJ