So as you all know, when ever I get a letter from Josh (which I get at least one a day now) I do not read them. The letters are building up in the table, and I am just not so sure what to do. I have thrown them away and then I go back and get them out of the trash. Its driving me wild :angry:

Today, I called the phone company that services the prison where he is located. I closed the account so he can no longer try to call me ever again. He has tried calling twice today but I have not accepted. I refuse to pay :eek: $38 dollars :eek: for a phone call in which is just a waste of time. :rolleyes:

I just wished he would have listened to me in my letter. :blah: I asked him not to call me or write or anything like that, to just let go because that is the easiest and that is what I want. :( I even said that if his feelings were true he would do what I asked, and that is to leave me alone. I know that is wrong for me to say, because if is feelings were true he would fight for me. :blah:

I see that I am just rambling on, :rolleyes: but it feels better getting it out in the open. I find that it helps the thinking process when I talk about the situation. Thanks guys for reading this and helping me out :D

HUGS

Melissa

Sorry you are going through a break up. If it's not too personal, why did you tell him to stop writing or calling in the first place?

Sorry you are having a hard time. I cant imagine how difficult it must be. Hang in there and know that we are all here to support you. You can get through this...just continue being strong!!!

You are a strong woman Mel ! If you were not you wouldn't be able to not read those letters or take calls! I applaud you and wish I could be more like you instead of hoping the dang phone will ring

Hang in there

~~HUGS~~ I'm so sorry that you are feeling so blue right now.. I really want you to know that things will get better for you. It is all darkest befor the Dawn.. Hang in we are here for you no matter what. You want to ramble hon just ramble away!!

Mel~! DO NOT read the letters! Don't do it girl, you know if you do your just gonna either get angry, or really down about it! It will serve you no good to read them!

If you don't answer the calls, or the letters then sooner or later he will stop. You have to do whats best for YOU right now!

I think that he is probably hurting from the loss of the relationship as well. I always knew that my breakup with Mark was alot harder on HIM than me (and it was torture for me) because while I was able to go about my life, meet new people and experience new things... he wasn't able to. He had all the time in the world to sit and think about things. We always try to fool ourselves into thinking that others don't feel the loss of the relationship... and I don't believe that to be true in any case.

Sending you some strength hun! You will get through this!!!!

Ramble Away... I'm listening

Heather

I give you alot of credit......... it takes a very strong woman to remain so strong. Keep doing what you're doing as long as YOU are happy. Best of Luck.

Sorry you are going through a break up. If it's not too personal, why did you tell him to stop writing or calling in the first place?


To make a long story short basically Josh asked me to choose between my momma and him, and that is an easy one....HELLO the woman that gave me life will always win in my eyes. We have been on and off for awhile now and I honestly do not even know why I put "it" back on because "it" was no longer there.



Thank you all ladies for those encouraging words because I really needed to hear them today! I do think that the loss of a relationship is hard on all involved parties. I feel like I am being selfish in a way because I am trying my hardest to not care about him right now. I have to do that because I am such a people pleaser at times I am so afraid that I will go back to just make him happy, and not do it because of me.

Trust me, I will probably ramble more later on. I am going to go and lay down and try to get rid of this oncoming headache :(

HUGS

Mel

Mel-


I swear, every time I read another posting from you, it makes me think of my situation! It's so funny that we are going through the EXACT same thing, down to the fact that both of our ex's are named Josh! Hun, I'm here for you whenever you need to ramble on. For me, at the moment, the letters have stopped. Last week, I called the phone company and got my phone blocked because he wouldn't stop calling. What's he do? He gets a phone debit card and continues to call! Now he added my cell phone to his list of numbers and today, at about 10 am he started calling my cell! I was soooooo mad! See I work afternoons so I sleep during the morning and he just kept calling and calling! I told him in the break up letter to just let me be, stop calling and writing, it makes it that much harder to move on, but he hasn't stopped yet! Hopefully with time, the letters will stop and so will the calls. Whatever you do, do not read those letters. Mine are safe, with my mom, about 30 minutes away so I cannot read them. I know it's not the right time. Your best bet, give them to someone you trust to hold onto, then when you're really over this and you feel you can handle those letters, get them back and then read them! They just don't make this easy for us, do they???

You are strong.. I was never able to not read the letters he sent to me.. and heck, I still answer his phone calls out here... I'm not real good at letting go completely.. I still need to know that he is alive and we always said that we would remain friends, even though a while back he stole from me when he was gacked out of his mind, I forgave him because I know why he did it.. I, of course, will never let him back into my home, but I still have to hear from him from time to time...

swtmel and dinky...You guys are really going through a tough time and it must be so hard to NOT read a letter that is sitting right in front of you...I am in the process of a extremely sad divorce and am craving some sort of letter giving me peace of mind instead of nastiness from prison...god bless us all.