Hi, my name is Veronica. I live in the very busy metro Bay Area in California, near San Francisco. I am a TV producer and studio tech. I NEVER thought I would love a man who EVER had been to prison. I had such a bad idea of prisoners, they were taken care of while we paid for them, they had 3 squares and a roof while we had to work for everything we got. I am slowly coming out of that frame of mind since knowing my husband of a year and a half, Cliff. He was on parole for burglary when I met him but he didn't tell me right away. When we started talking about spending the rest of our lives together, he told me. I wasn't detoured for one moment. I loved the man he had become, not who he WAS! I'm sure you all can relate to that. He is in San Quentin State Prison in California on a parole violation. It isn't easy for me to still be with him. Along with my husband went our major means of support financially and emotionally. We write but no visits yet, he hasn't been endorsed yet. It's been since March 7. That's one of the things I don't like about the prison system. The more I talk with the officials there, the more I have come to understand what the incarcerated go through. They treat the family of the incarcerated just like the incarcerated. Cliff will be home by July 17 of this year, hopefully sooner. So this is me. I will try to catch live chats when I can. Feel free to email me if anyone wants to talk.
Thanks for listening! :cuffs:

Welcome aboard Ve

Gosh, it sounds like you have a very interesting job. I'm located in the valley, about 1 1/2 hr drive, East Southeast of SF airport.

VERONICA,
WELCOME TO PTO, GLAD YOU FOUND US. I'M SURE THAT I SPEAK FOR MOST OF US WHEN I SAY THAT I TOO HAD NO CONCEPT OF WHAT INMATESS WENT THROUGH OR HOW THEIR FAMILIES SUFFERED UNTIL IT BECAME PART OF MY LIFE. IT IS NOW UP TO PEOPLE LIKE US TO TRY TO CHANGE THOSE THINGS. I HATE TO ASK FOR SOMETHING AT YOUR FIRST POST BUT MAYBE YOU HAVE SOME SUGGESTIONS FOR THOSE OF US THAT HAVE BEEN TRYING TO GET ON TV AND SPEAK ABOUT THIS. THOUGHT YOU MIGHT SINCE YOU ARE A PRODUCER.
ANYWAY, WELCOME TO THE PTO FAMILY, IT HAS BEEN A GREAT SOURCE OF SUPPORT, KNOWLEDGE AND RESCOURCE FOR ME AS I'M SURE IT WILL BE FOR YOU!
YOU AND CLIFF ARE BOTH IN MY THOUGHTS.
MICHELLE

veronica-glad you have joined us here-think we can all relate to your statement of family members being treated like the incarcerated. I think of this every time I stand in the visiting line for hours, or am questioned about what me or one of my kids are wearing-etc-am sure this is only a minute fragment of what inmates feel daily so i know it has got to be very difficult for them to hold it together-i often want to erupt just based on those few hours on sunday-anyway, you have found a good group here --

take care

sherri

Just wanted to add one more welcome and I understand. I love my husband - the man he is. We're here for you.

Adding my welcome to. Yes, every one of us has a story to tell of how the families are treated. I for one was told that I do not figure into the picture and have no rights to my husband. I fought that battle and won, but still have to win the war. I look forward to hearing from you and hang in there.

Joy

Just wanted to add another quick "welcome" and say thanks for joining us!! Glad to hear that you won't have to endure the situation too much longer! I look forward to getting to know you better...

Welcome from me too...I am sure your time will go pretty fast-each day you are ONE day CLOSER!! I also had the opinion-you did it -you deserve it!! Well now my husband is the one who did it and am seeing how things REALLY work!
I also think you may be able to shed some light on soem things we are trying to accomplish here-with your being a producer and all....but anyway..welcome and I am glad you found this wonderful group!

Welcome from me too. sorry to hear how they treat you but I know everybody here is going through the same thing. hang in there and let us get to know you better

Welcome!!!!I'm sure everyone who visits a loved one in prison
goes through much of the same.Thats great it's not for much longer. Take care........

I wanted to say my welcome as well! This is 1 very supportive & caring group of people. We are all going through the same situation...our loved 1's are incarcerated so we can all relate & understand. I look forward to hearing more from you.
I too thought like you Veronica...since I have been with EJ my eyes have been opened WIDE! Now I fight for myself when I want to visit him, get letters or calls & I fight for him whenever I can.

Take care!
D

Welcome to PTO Veronica!

VERONICA:

WELCOME TO PTO.... I KNOW YOU MUST BE VERY GLAD YOUR HUSBAND WILL BE HOME SOON...... I AM ALSO GLAD THAT THIS HAS BROUGHT YOUR ATTENTION TO THE WAY THINGS REALLY ARE...... MOST OF THE PRISONERS IN THE UNITED STATES ARE NOT BAD PEOPLE.... THEY HAVE MADE STUPID ERRORS IN JUDGEMENT AT CERTAIN TIMES IN THEIR LIVES.

THIS SHOULD NOT GIVE THE RIGHT TO THE DOC OR OUR ELECTED OFFICIALS TO TREAT THEIR FAMILIES WITH SO MUCH DISRESPECT. MOST OF US ARE HARD WORKING, INDIVIDUALS WITH EDUCATIONS WHO HOPE TO MAKE CHANGES IN THE JUSTICE SYSTEM AND THE WAY IT IS OPERATED..... YES, OUR GREAT US IS THE BEST COUNTRY IN THE WORLD, BUT WE STILL NEED TO WAKE UP AND MAKE SOME CHANGES IN HOW WE DEAL WITH SITUATIONS.....

WELCOME AGAIN AND GOD BLESS

DONNA

welcome to PTO

You are so right the families of imates get treated just as bad as the inmates. It is hard to believe. I just want you to know that Cliff will be home before you know it.. :)

WOW! Thanks, you guys! I feel very welcome here! There has been many inquiries as to how I can help get your messages on TV. Ever since the injustice of my husband being put in jail versus getting help for him was done, I have been thinking of how I can get the word out about the REAL stories. I'm thinking of doing a documentary on the prison system and how the wrong decisions on the parts of the "justice" system have the WORST effect on the families. I'm still kickin' around the idea. ANY ideas are welcome at this point. It seems that I have the means and the contacts, what better use? I'm going to copy this and start a new thread, if that's OK???
Anyway, thanks for being here!

SOUNDS LIKE A GREAT IDEA VERONICA AND YOU WILL FIND A LOT OF PEOPLE WHO WILL BE WILLING TO HELP IN ANY WAY THEY CAN HERE AT PTO

SHERRI

VERONICA:


THIS IS EXACTLY WHAT NEEDS TO BE DONE..... THERE ARE MANY STORIES HERE ON THIS WEB SITE ALONE THAT WILL MAKE YOUR HAIR STAND ON END...... PEOPLE ON THE OUTSIDE HAVE NO IDEA WHAT IS REALLY HAPPENING IN THE D.O.C'S ALL OVER THE US AND IN THE JUSTICE SYSTEM ITSELF..

OUR ONLY HOPE FOR CHANGE IS TO GET THE STORY OUT..... I HAVE NEVER HAD THE CONTACTS TO DO THAT, BUT I WOULD BE WILLING TO HELP YOU IN ANY MANNER TO GET THIS DONE...... VISITATION IS ONE AREA, HEALTH CARE ANOTHER THAT IS BAD..... EACH STATE IS DIFFERENT IN THE WAY THE D.O.C. HANDLES THINGS AND INMATES..... EACH UNIT IS DIFFERENT.... SOME ARE MORE CARING THAN OTHERS.....

JUST TELL ME WHAT AND I WILL DO IT....... YOU CAN E-MAIL ME OR POST HERE EITHER WAY.

DONNA

64 more days to go I know you're excited! But yeah, they do treat the incarcerated like the incarcerated. I was in visitation one day with my fiance and we were holding hands and the guards walked past us and says to Steven 'Yeah ya'll better hold hands now.' I'm like huh? Steven said that he always picks with him but I was kind of upset. They should cut us some slack.

I am SO excited! I just got to visit him on Mother's Day, first time EVER in a prison. I was surprised how packed it was. He was really good about reminding me to keep my hands in site. A couple times we got kinda close and the guard sort of motioned but didn't say anything. No one has been rude or impolite, YET! I'm going to try to see him Friday.
Woo Hoo!
Veronica

An inmate told me some years ago that to be able to "cop a feel" was at the vending mech. with buddies and there vistors gathered around for a bit, long enough to get her nipples to respond and that was a trip to heaven that night and nights to come or is that "cum" ~EG~

nice to hear your visit was good, Veronica

Yeah, Bray you learn to appreciate the 'little' things :D

I saw Cliff last Saturday, all day! It was wonderful, although we were watched so close we couldn't try your suggestion BRay! :D
I got some news that Cliff may be coming home sooner, like around July 2!!! Just in time for the 4th of July!!! If that happens, the 4th of July will mean more than America's independance to us! Can't wait to find out for sure, I'll let all of you know when I do.
:dance: :haha:

Wow, that would be great if he'd be coming home on July 2nd. I'm keeping my fingers crossed!!

congratulations, veronica! sounds like things are going so well for the two of you! *hugs*

VERONICA-BET THERE WILL BE SOME SERIOUS FIREWORKS AT YOUR HOUSE ON THE 4TH OF JULY.....

Soraya,
Thanks! I'm keeping my fingers, toes, legs, arms and eyes crossed for this one! :ha:

AprilCat,
Thanks! Sometimes I think about all of the time we are missing and grieve. I know everything will be OK!

Sherri,
:D I can hardly contain my excitement! SERIOUS fireworks at our house that night!

I am so happy!! I got a call from my baby yesterday. He is getting out July 1!!!! 16 days early!! Watch out 4th of July, we are going to give your fireworks some competition!
:D :p :dance: :yes: :wave: :hee: :haha: :ha:

SUPER COOL!!!!!!!!!!

WOW!! that's good news girl!!! this month will fly by!! congrats with his coming home!

Thanks BRay and Soraya! My friend, Lori is taking all of us on another trip to L.A.! This time with Cliff! She's the greatest!

man, i envy you veronica-but an very happy for you just the same-make sure you go to marina del rey on your trip- it is my favorite place!

Well, I found out some news. :(
For two and a half weeks now, Cliff has been able to call and write the kids. When Cliff gets out, the no-contact order will be back in place. He will have to find a place to live until it's lifted. That is not fair. He is not a danger to anyone, especially to the most precious things in his life. Depending on his PO, he may not even be able to go to LA with us like we planned. I hope he can. I am so mixed up emotionally inside. I am bubbling with excitement that he's home in about 2 weeks but I am also furious at the conditions that will be in place when he comes home. This is a classic example of how the CDC screws the people who want to change their criminal lifestyle and go straight. They know he wants to be around his kids, they know he never meant to hurt anyone, yet they put this stupid no-contact order on him. We are married, he is a dad, we should be able to live together and he should be able to give his own kids a hug.
I feel helpless and angry. :argh

Veronica,

I know what you going through, CDC can be a big hinderance to someone cleaning up there life. I get the feeling it's cause they have their little book to go by & if people get hurt by it "oh well", they are going to follow it. There are some good POs but they have to fight with the bureaucracy too.

As for transfers all the counties are different. Orange County gives them pretty easy. I had a friend I did alot of time with (in fact he did most of my tattoos), he was paroled to Riverside county. He had a home in Orange county, A job in Orange county, & a family in Orange county. All he had in Riverside was the same situation that got him locked up to begin with. Orange county would have accepted his parole, but Riverside wouldn't give it. So he had to sneak around, & kept pushing for a transfer which he got a year later.

So good luck, I hope things work out, & if your still into production work your comming to the right place.-----Ken

veronica...just relax on your trip! have fun and enjoy a few days away from your "normal" life. i am keeping cliff in my thoughts and hope things work out for him!

VERONICA:

hON, i KNOW HOW BAD YOU MUST BE HURTING.... SURELY THIS RESTRICTION WILL NOT BE ON HIM FOR VERY LONG..... THIS IS JUST ANOTHER WAY OF GOUGING THE INMATE.... I WILL NEVER UNDERSTAND THEIR REASONING.... I GUESS THEY FEEL HE MUST PROVE HIMSELF BEFORE THEY ALLOW HIM TO BE AROUND THE CHILDREN.... SOCIAL SERVICES ARE THE SAME WAY, BUT THE PEOPLE WHO ARE A REAL DANGER MANAGE TO CON THEM AND USUALLY END UP HARMING THE CHILD.... PEOPLE WHO ARE FOR REAL AND ARE REALLY TRYING TO MAKE A CHANGE, THEY SEEM TO HARRASS. WHO KNOWS

MY PRAYERS ARE WITH YOU ALL. AT LEAST HE WILL BE HOME. MAYBE YOU COULD POSTPONE YOUR TRIP FOR A LITTLE WHILE... SURELY THIS WILL NOT LAST LONG.

MY LOVE
DONNA

VERONICA- SORRY YOU GUYS ARE HAVING TO DEAL WITH THIS-AND I REALLY HOPE THEY WILL ALLOW HIM TO GO ON THE TRIP ( I THOUGHT THEY JUST COULD NOT GO OUT OF STATE) HOW LONG WILL HE BE ON PAROLE? I KNOW IT IS VERY RESTRICTIVE BUT IT HAS GOT TO BE BETTER THAN BEING BEHIND BARS. I HOPE THE ISSUE WITH THE KIDS GETS WORKED OUT SOON. TAKE CARE- WE ARE HERE FOR YOU

Ken-
They shouldn't classify everyone in the same category, they should look at the different cases and give punishments accordingly. But they don't and probably never will.
Cliff doesn't want a transfer, he wants a weekend pass to go out of the county. I don't think they will give it to him.
Thanks for your well wishes. Yes I am still into production. What did you mean by if your still into production work your comming to the right place ???
:D

I forgot the rest of you!
:rolleyes:

aprilcat-
Thanks for keeping him in your thoughts! I don't think I can relax on a vacation with out my husband. :( I think we may postpone.

Donna-
I don't know how long the restriction will be on him, maybe long enough for him to start his anger management and parenting classes.
I hope it won't last long. Thanks for thinking of us!!

Sherri-
I don't know much about leaving the state or going on vacation while on parole so I'll update all of you when we find out more.
Cliff had his max parole date at August 10 of this year, then this happens. It's almost like they looked at his file and said, "Oh this one's ready to get off parole, what can we do to screw him up". Now he's off parole, for GOOD, on January 26, 2003. The day before my birthday.

Let's see...hmmm...He's coming home July first (just in time for the 4th of July) and he gets off parole for good the day before my birthday.
Yup, it's kid makin time! :D

Thanks guys!!!

:D I like the way you put it: "Yup, it's kid making time"

Thanks, Soraya! Now I have to tell him that! :p

Kidding. :D

Oh Veronica... so sorry to hear about the restrictions they are putting on Cliff... so unfair, seems like "they" just want to set one up for failure so "they" can perpetuate the image of a "con".
BUT... don't let any of this get you down or stand in the way of your happiness. Good luck on "the kid making". Everything will work out, in God's time. My prayers are with you.

Thanks China~

It IS unfair. Almost every story I read here in the introductions seems unjustice has been done. It burns me to no end! :argh

But, we have to learn how to beat them at their own game. Talking about the in-humane treatment, showing people what has been done behind their backs, bringing the injustice into the light of day for everyone to see and make their OWN judgements is what we all need to do. Don't clam up and stay in your houses, get out there and talk to anyone and everyone who will listen. They will get the point and someone, somewhere will finally have the courage to speak up and create some change in the justice system.

I am off my soap box now. :rolleyes:

Hi everybody!

Well, as you all know from my signature, Cliff is home on Monday!!!! I took that week off to be with him and get everything situated so I will not be around here. If I get a chance at a computer, I will pop in and say hi, but I'm not planning on it. Thank you all for the support and well wishes and keeping me going. :cool:

Now starts the next stage, parole. Cliff will become a member as soon as he can to give everyone his veiws of what's happening.

In the mean time...
For those of you who have your loved ones home:
Enjoy the fireworks this fourth as a special moment of freedom!
And for those who are still waiting:
Be comforted by the fact that when they look into the night sky, they see the same stars as you do.
They are wanting to come home to you as much as you are wanting them home.
:)

You enjoy your week off...I'm so happy for you! You and Cliff bring hope for all of us here, I'm sure! Looking forward to hearing from Cliff and his inputs at PTO!

Pam

I agree with Pamela, you give us hope. And I'm looking forward to meet that wonderful man of yours. have fun!! :D

VERONICA- I CAN CERTAINKY UNDERSTAND WHY YOU DONT PLAN ON GETTING ON THECOMPUTER NEXT WEEK-AM SURE THAT WOULD BE THE LAST THING ON YOUR MIND- HOPE YOU HAVE A WONDERFUL WEEK WITH CLIFF-

BUT "Y'ALL COME BACK NOW, YOU HEAR"
ONCE YOU GUYS GET SETTLED IN WE EXPECT TO HEAR BACK FROM YOU

PEACE, AND HAVE A GREAT 4TH!

Veronica, I've been away for awhile, & just realized Cliff comes home on the first, & today is the 2nd. Did everything work out ok, God I hope it did. Heres best wishes to you, Cliff, & your family!!!!! Ken

SHE WAS RIGHT.... SHE HAS NOT BEEN ON HERE AT ALL THIS WEEK.... I BET THAT HOUSEHOLD IS A ROCKING...... HOPE ALL THE HAPPINESS IN THE WORLD TO THEM


DONNA

Hi this is Cliff. Thanks for holding my wife's hand and providing support for her. Right now, I am trying to get things straightened out and our lives back on track. After I get settled and our lives in some sort of order, I will be signing on here, to provide any help and support to people whom need it. This is a very helpful site for families going through the the so-called justice system.


This is Veronica;
Everything is stiil up in the air with his P.O. Luckily the P.O. he ended up having is trying to follow the court order that says he can have supervised contact, rather than a blanket "no-contact" that they were going by. We still have a long road ahead of us. I just wanted to pop in and let Cliff see who I have been pouring my guts out to these past few months. I will be back on next week some time! Cliff will be on when he can access a computer.
Thanks everybody!
Have a great 4th!!!

Good to hear that y'all can spend time as a family. I guess that means he can put them to bed and then, "let the good times roll" ~EG~

Welcome Cliff, It's good to see your out. Hope to here more from you. I got out in Dec. 97 & discharged my number in Jan. 2001, so some of my knowledge of CDC may be a little old. Well, it's always good to see someone hit the gate.-----Ken

Cliff,
Congrats to you and Veronica on your release!!!!!
It is so wonderful to have you here for support and advice, WELCOME.
Michelle

Hi everybody
Things are not going well.
The day Cliff got out of San Quentin, we stayed together, just de-compressing from the past 6 months of hell. The next day we entered a different hell. I went with him to his PO, we wanted to talk about the special condition imposed by the BPT on Cliff of no contact with his own children (step though they may be but he considers his regardless of parentage). He got a young, green PO who was super nice and was going to look into getting it lifted. But then his old PO came in and looked at me then looked at Cliff and said flat out, "NO CONTACT PERIOD!!!!" Almost yelling it like we were deaf. Then he looked at me and said to me directly, "I don't ever want you in here again. You shouldn't be here. There are things said here that you can't hear." Like what? The way you verbally abuse me? What an a$$h@le! Anyway as I left the young one appologised so I knew that PO was out of order.


Man I am frustrated. I will post more about our ordeal later.

sorry to hear about all this veronica-hopefully the new po will hel make some positive things happen--keep us posted

really sorry to hear how bad it's been going. I hope it gets better soon! God Bless!!!

VERONICA:

BLESS YOU HON AND CLIFF TOO. THIS IS JUST ANOTHER WAY OF PUNCHING YOU WHEN YOU ARE DOWN... I WILL NEVER UNDERSTAND THE MIND SET OF SOME OF THESE P.O'S AND OFFICERS IN THE PRISON SYSTEM.... I GUESS THEY LOVE THE FEELING OF POWER....

WHY IS HE SO UPSET WITH YOU? COULD IT BE BECAUSE YOU HAVE ACCESS TO THE MEDIA? PROBABLY? THEY WANT TO PUSH THEIR WEIGHT AROUND AND JUST SHOW YOU THAT YOU HAVE NO POWER, THAT THEY HAVE THE POWER...

AS TIME GOES ON, MAYBE THINGS WILL GET BETTER. PLEASE, PLEASE DON'T LET THEM GET THE BEST OF YOU AND CLIFF... YOU GUYS HAVE A GREAT FUTURE.... TAKE IT ONE DAY AT A TIME... SOLVE THE PROBLEMS OF THAT DAY, THEN GO TO THE NEXT.

MY PRAYERS AND LOVE GO OUT TO YOU BOTH..

LOVE A
DONNA

Veronica:

I missed all your welcome party, and the story of you and Cliff, until I jsut saw Cliff's joined the site.

Reading all of this thread in one fell swoop, sure gives me a sense of all you've been enduring! Lord, how can you even breathe girl, with these continual punches!

Anyway, with both you and Cliff here now, at least you have a few more sympathetic ears listening, than you seem to have in the PO's office!

Love,
Menolly

Hi Again!

Thanks Menolly, we've been pushed around alright but we're still here!

Donna- They don't know I'm about to expose them, thank goodness!

Thanks Dave's Wife and Sherri!


OK, here's what's going on:
Cliff finally logged on and has posted! YEAH! Thanks to all of you who warmly greeted him (and me!) ;-)

Cliff is doing his Anger management and finding a parenting class and scheduling visits with his kids and the CPS worker and going to family and individual counseling AND trying to buy a company! All this while trying to keep his sanity and his wife happy (easy task)! I am very proud of Cliff stepping up and playing their game instead of rebelling against the system. He's a real man among men.

I am slowly going crazy with all of the meetings, counseling sessions and appointments I have to keep up with. I'm glad I don't have a 9 to 5-er!

Needless to say we both are so busy. The documentary is still going on, I'm getting close to shooting it. I'll write more about it in the Documentary Forum.

Thank you, everyone, for being here.

Thank you, David, for creating this welcoming warm home to hang a weary head once in a while.

I've been absent for a while, I think you all deserve an update on Cliif and me.

Things have calmed down a bit, we are jumping thru every flaming hoop CPS puts in front of us. Cliff goes to his anger management, he is managing his anger very well. We all go to family counseling every week to work out the kinks. Cliff and I are going to couples counseling, working on our parenting styles and each of the kids has there own counselor. I am extremely stressed out trying to keep up with all of that plus laundry, homework, my job etc. James is a lot better than before. Please see my post here about him, "The story of a would-be teenage murderer". It got so bad with James, we were thinking of finding a boot camp. We didn't send him, but I have the info if anyone wants it. Cliff and James had to come to an understanding. They had a huge blow out but talked it out and had a good cry and a big long hug and James has been wonderful ever since. I was truly inspired by the way Cliff handled James. I think James had blamed himself for Cliff getting taken away. James knows it wasn't his fault. So now Jessica (13) and Jacob (9) are starting to get in trouble at school just when James is being good. It's like they think someone has to be the "bad one" for our family to run right. We are dealing with that in family sessions. I'm writing like each one of you is a member of my family, thinking you know my children. I just feel like I can vent here. If anyone listens, great, if anyone feeds back, even better, if anyone gets solutions to their own problems thru this, WONDERFUL!!!

I am hard at work, not only in television but putting together this documentary. Please visit the forum, "Television Documentary Project" for more info on that. I'll have a very important announcement soon in that forum, so keep checking. I plan on attending the PTO March Conference and doing interviews there. Cliff will come with me, I am really looking forward to meeting all of you in person!

Cliff was working on buying the company he works for, that fell thru, the company is closing instead. Not to worry, he already has another job lined up. He is in construction management.

I appologise for not being around as often as I would like to be. I wish everyone laughter and health!

Veronica- Thanks for the update! Soubnds like you guys are doing all the right things! Glad to hear James is doing better--I am sure Jacob and Jessica will come around too- there has been a lot of change in all of your lives lately and it will take some adjusting-keep in touch-we care about you guys!!!

Good to hear from you Veronica!! Sounds like you guys are handling everything CDC is handing out in a very healty manner. It won't help to get angry and frustrated with the system on the outside anymore that it does with the system on the inside. Thank God Cliff is out and working to get his family back together! What a blessing indeed!!

Veronica
I too am so thankful for finding this site. I have also had problems with the prison officials. I have emphysema and it's quite difficult to make the trip down to see my grandson.
My first trip down I called and asked for directions. They sent me on the wrong highway and I was halfway to Madison before I turned around. When I showed the guard the directions I had been given, it said whoever told me that didn't know what they were talking about. I called when I was having shoes sent to him and asked what address I had to mail them to, they gave me the wrong address. One is for letters and one for packages. OOPs, they made another mistake and gave me the wrong address. It made me mad, but I stay quiet because I don't want them to retaliate with him. I agree the whole system should be looked into. You are in a position to make a difference and it is wonderful of you to do it. There should be more people like you in this world. I'm very thankful for finding this site.

HI VERONICA


I AM SO VERY GLAD TO HEAR FROM YOU AND CLIFF. GLAD TOO, THAT THINGS ARE BEGINNING TO SMOOTH OUT SOME. THE OTHER TWO KIDS WILL WORK THINGS OUT. THEY JUST NEED SOME TIME AND UNDERSTAND THAT BOTH OF YOU LOVE THEM. STAY CLOSE TO THEM AND LET THEM VENT TO YOU. I AM SURE THAT THEY TOO HAVE SOME ANGER.

I AM GLAD THAT YOU ARE STILL WORKING ON THE DOCUMENTARY. I HOPE SINCERELY THAT IT ALL WORKS OUT AND THAT SOMEONE LISTENS TO WHAT YOU ARE SAYING.

MY PRAYERS AND LOVE
DONNA

Veronica, It's wonderful to be here with you all when news comes of someone being released. I wish you all the happiness your hearts can hold. It's hard now, but things you work hard for are more special than things that come easily.
I pray the rest of your lifes journey together will hold nothing but good times for your whole family.

Veronica,
Welcome to the pto family.
Sherry

Thanks everybody! I am in full documentary mode now.

I wanted to post something of an update on what's going on with Cliff and CPS and the big 'P' (parole) plus put it back up there so the new people can see who I am.

Tuesday we have a court date. This will mark a whole year we have been dealing with this. Our CPS worker is going to reccommend Cliff move back into the home and has talked with Cliff's PO who said they will go along with what ever the court says! Can you believe it? No special conditions to worry about. They see the changes, the growth, the positive steps on Cliff's part to make this work. Cliff has been able to stay the weekends for a while now and we spent xmas and NYE all together. I can't help but to think of how wonderful a man I have in my life. Cliff didn't have to step up to the plate like he has, these kids are not his biologically. He could have said 'see-ya' at the first sign of hardship, he could have easily saved himself (and us) a lot of flak. But these kids ARE his kids, in his heart. He loves them and me and we are growing so much closer as a family. Nothing but good stuff here. I anticipate CPS will ask for another 6 months of services, counseling and such, then in July, both Parole and CPS will be out of our lives for good! I really can't wait.

Well, that's my update. I think I'll work some more on the documentary.
~V

Oh wow, this is so wonderful Veronica. I'm so happy for you and Cliff, the kids too!!!
Nothing but blue skys and sunshine for ya'll!

thanks so much, for sharing with us we suport you, i don't like the point that he was not up front with you. I have a felony in my past and after our first date (with my present wife) I told I had a felony in my background and that if it was to cause her any embarassment or discomfort she could call it quits before we became involved. I felt we hit it off from the start and would see more of each other.
In any case i hope for your sake this is a one time thing and you are not being drawn into his lifestyle

Welcome to PTO!!!
CJ

Cara Veronica,

A bientot! Glad you're here too, welcome! As well, good luck with your boyfriend, Cliff. The best to both of you! Ciao, for now.

Hi
Thanks Cheena! Yes, nothing but good stuff!

pan- I applaude your honesty with your wife. Cliff wasn't up front at first but as we got to know each other and realized that we were getting to be more involved he told me and gave me the choice of to stay or leave. I stayed. I have never been drawn into his previous lifestyle, if anyhting I was the influence on him to join my lifestyle. Thank you for caring enough to respond!

Thankyou freckles, and welcome to you too!

reality, thank you for your well wishes! Welcome to you as well. Just a point of clarification, Cliff is my husband.

I am attaching a picture of our "little family". It's from Summertime, I don't look like that anymore but you can get the idea.

Sorry for the little tease there...

Hi Veronica,
Sounds like you guys have really been through it. Sounds like you're all on the right track. Keep up the good work. I hope everything goes well.

Thank you, we will make it!
:)

It's been a while since I've given a report.

My husband is a restored citizen as of July 10, 2003!

You can not imagine the relief and freedom we feel. He can go anywhere with out reporting to someone or peeing in a cup. He can move residence. He can vote, he can do anything except own a firearm! AND! We are out of the family court system.

It's all over!

Thank you to all who have lent me your ear and opened your home here at PTO to us.

Now this does not mean that I am going anywhere, no way! I think I can still help people understand that just because their loved one is in prison or jail, it's NOT the end of your world. Look at what we have been through and we are still here, still a family. So be prepared to see Cliff at the next PTO convention in 2004 (held in the West Coast) (VOTE WEST COAST!)

PLUS I am still doing a documentary for PTO about the effects prison has on the families on the inmates. It will be nothing like "A Sentence of Their Own". There is a Forum all about it in the Projects section.

Anyway, it's late and I wanted to welcome all of the new folks and fill you in on what's been going on with us.


Love to you all! Don't give up!

The only way we can change anything in this country is by being a majority, and having some political power. If the majority of the people inn this land want to change the way prisons are run and how people get in them and how the families are dealt with, it will happen. That is why it is so important to be in this documentary and share your voice. I can understand annonimity in this day and age but the voice is the strongest. I strongly urge you to share your voice in order to make the changes!

Everyone, please consider contributing a story or a comment.

Thanks!!

There are so many great new folks joining all the time I just had to post and put this up there one more time.

Veronica,

Congratulatiosn to you both!

Please keep your work up and pushing the prison situation to the fore. One way that the general public will know is for people to share their stories. The other is through numbers and organizations such as PTO.

We admire those who are willing to share their stories on film or radio. Then there are those who work through sites such as PTO.

Believe me - as I say below - I will NOT be silenced! nor should you be!

You have your medium - film - Linda and I have ours - for Linda it is the spoken word, for me it is the written word!

God Bless - Good Luck!

Patti

Welcome to the PTO family!

Thanks MrsHarris!

And thankyou, Patti!
I will keep it up, and you too. The more people rise and make know the exact situation we are in the more likely it will be addressed adn then changed!

Thanks for all of your encouragement.

We should collaborate some time!

Veronica

HOORAW!!! :)

i not only think it is a GREAT idea you do a doc. (or whatever it may be you are doing) on how it effects US to have a family member, loved one, husband AND OR wife in prison..my baby has been in for a little over 10 yrs. i have known him for 3 yrs i believe..but, damn, in those 3 yrs...its just hard to explain! anyways, im SO happy HOORAW that your hubby is now a citizen. that is SO great!! anyways, good luck and god bless! :)

Veronica,

I would love to collaborate a little, let me get out of this mess I've managed to create, and maybe we can. I pray to be back home in San Francisco by late next year.

Patti

Thankyou, lovinbilly4ever!

Patti,
just email me when it's a good time for you!